Kid's Toy Delays Trans-Pacific Flight 90 Minutes

I was comfortably seated in business class on a Singapore Airlines 777-300ER recently, ready for an on-time departure from Hong Kong to San Francisco. Boarding was quick and efficient, and all was well...or so it seemed.

We sat waiting for pushback, and the Singapore Girls silently glided through the cabin, serving drinks, offering magazines and newspapers, and readying the aircraft....And we waited....

And we waited....

After 30 minutes, people switched on their electronic devices, and got up to use the lavs. After 60 minutes, I asked the FA serving me my second glass of champagne what was causing the delay.

Her reply:

"A child dropped a toy into part of the aircraft's ventilation system. The engineers are working on it right now."

Yep.

Reason #284 not to bring young kids on the plane. Crosscheck and I have gone on record as being generally against kids on planes, especially long-haul routes. And I personally have taken flack about that on FlyerTalk, MilePoint, and on other blogs. Regardless of your position, you have to admit, there's something silly (and avoidable) about a little kid's toy delaying a trans-Pacific journey by 90 minutes. That was the eventual magnitude of the delay, when we finally landed at SFO.

But...we arrived safely, and (otherwise) uneventfully, and for that I am certainly grateful. Thank you SQ.

Disclaimer: For all I know, it was the parent who dropped the toy down the vent. I'm just telling you what the FA told the pax. Also, the model plane shown here almost definitely isn't the one that clogged up the vents on my flight...

The Post-Flight Questionnaire: Who Was Your Seatmate?

Co-blogger Crosscheck and I fly pretty often (both over 100,000 flight miles last year) but rarely are we traveling together (we live in different countries). So whenever one of us flies, the other always asks:


Who was your seatmate?

Every once in a while there are stories of the Person of Size, the guy with a sleeveless t-shirt (shudder), the teen with oversize laptop computer (more about that in a future post), the Global Services member who sells pistachios for a living, the off-duty pilot, or the hot chick (yeah!).

With that in mind, it occurred to me that there ought to just be a form we can fill out and e-mail to the other person...like the one I created below...

What would you ask about your friend's seatmate?


Airline (and aircraft type):

From (airport code):
To (airport code):

My seatmate was:

Sex

_ Empty next to!

_ Male

_ Female
_ Honestly? Not sure

Size

_ Small

_ Medium

_ Large
_ POS

Hygiene

_ Clean

_ Dirty

Noise

_ Totally Quiet
_ Quiet except for "hello" or "may I get up please?"

_ Chatty in a harmless way
_ Flirting
_ Would not fucking shut up

Looks

_ Scary looking

_ Average

_ Hot!

Attire
_ Dressed casually but OK
_ In goddamn sweats
_ In business attire
_ Functionally? Practically naked.

Age

_ Crying baby
_ Kid (<18)
_ Youngish (18 to 29)

_ Medium age (30s or 40s)

_ Freakin' old! (>40)
_ Old Timer

Job/Career

Probably works as a:   ______

Comments/Noteworthy:

##

Feel free to use it, and if you get anyone good - drop us a line at exitrowaisle@gmail.com.

Why Is Your Child on This Airplane?

I recently read a column that purported to advise parents how to deal with "child haters" who mistreat them just for bringing their kids on an airplane trip.

Excuse me? In a conversation a few years ago, my co-blogger Crosscheck said something that was like a revelation to me:

There is no reason for young children to travel on an airplane.

I have thought about this almost every time I've flown for the last several years. And after all that thinking about it, I have come to the following conclusion:

In the vast majority of cases, there is actually no reason for young children to travel on an aircraft (i.e., kids too young to understand the expectation of civil behavior). The exceptions would be the following:

• an ill child traveling to see a specialist for a severe disease; 

• a family paying its respects to a dying grandparent; or 

• a family relocating permanently across the country.

Otherwise? Why subject yourself to the agony of lugging all that crap around with you (strollers, diapers, wipes, formula, pacifiers, toys, books, video games)? 

Why subject other passengers to the avoidable interference in what is already a stressful pursuit (being cooped up in the tube in the sky)?

Why make the kids go through often-painful sinus compression and decompression (that they don't understand how to remedy), dehydration, and other deleterious effects of air travel? 

Just stay home, or take a driving trip, a train trip, or a boat trip.

Photo via Creative Commons